The Greatest Curry Eater In The West

hot

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Being from bangladesh our curries tend to be industrial strength with an extra helping of battery acid.

When I say our curries are hot picture an Indian (the original guys) running for the kitchen sink and drowning himself to relieve the feeling of a burning ember in his mouth.

Jalapeno and habanero?

Pah, not even warm.

So you can imagine what went through my mind when, on a training course from a job I had a few years back, one of my Italian colleagues boasted he can eat the hottest dishes around.

That was a boast and a half, considering he didn’t even know what ‘hot’ meant.

Madras, vindaloo and phals are a joke.

I told him, warned him, he hadn’t tried the really hot stuff… at least not the stuff I was used to.

He insisted – he could take anything I could throw at him.

It just so happened that, in the evenings, we ordered our own food in from the local takeaway  – so I offered to order his for him.

He agreed.

So I went to the takeaway and asked them what their hottest dish was.

It was a vindaloo.

I asked them to stick a few more chillis in.

Actually I asked them to put in a lot more chillis because I’d already tried it the night before and it was tame to say the least.

I took them both back, with the extra chillis, and handed one to my colleague in his room and left him to it.

I got back to my room and tucked in.

I was hungry and it tasted good, though I wished it was hotter.

The chillis they used weren’t very hot.

I guess they don’t want to risk making it too hot for the locals by accident.

A few minutes later I called down to my colleagues room by telephone and could hear sniffing and heavy breathing.

“How is it?” I asked him.

“It’s hot,” came the reply.

“Hottest thing you’ve tried?

“It’s hot,” he replied under laboured breathing.

“Okay,” I said and left him to it.

It kind of reminded me about the guy was who was the greatest kung fu fighter in the world… until he left his village for the first time in his life and was defeated by the first guy he met along the way.

Now, you may be wondering what my point is to this post… and… to be honest so am I.

I did have a point before I started but it’s gone.

I can’t remember.

However, having written all that down, I can’t bring myself to delete it all now.

Hope you enjoyed the story.

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Marko

Professional online marketer with over 20 years of experience in search engine marketing, digital marketing, direct advertising, and email marketing. Can be found cruising the streets of Boston Hardcore scene when not selling to the masses online.
Marko